Bushwhacker Liberal

try gay sex

2007-09-04T08:00:00.000-07:00

On being gay

2006-10-18T05:48:00.000-07:00

What is it? What is it Ive got? It’s a hunger, a desire, an overarching and compulsive need and want for something that is put to one side and ignored by a mind which cant fathom the possibility that it could happen to me. I don’t want it, I used to say, don’t think about it. You have to marginalize, subside and bring to the front of your mid what everyone else thinks about. What ten thousand years and more of human culture has told us is right. It’s the weight of our species, the crucible of a hundred million and countless poems, a thousand billion plays and books and stories, from great orator to a secret to your closest friend, the very existence of our civilisation is based upon a mans unbending, all consuming, for ever adoring love of a woman.

To be excluded from civilisation by something beyond our control. Left out of the joke, not told the story, I don’t get it. I can’t comprehend it. Why not? What’s wrong with me? Its sick and gross and perverted and a disease and will destroy our very way of life. That’s how they stop you from thinking about it, no not from thinking about it, they force you push it down so far in the depths of your soul, so far that if you ignore it for too long it will begin to consume you and then you will be dead. Or they scare you with what they have scared everyone in all of history with, the fear of forever damnation. You’re going to burn, all eternity in the depths of hell and you will never see God, so don’t ever do it. Don’t ever act upon that thing. Don’t even listen to it. See the man you want, fantasise about everything about him, his lips and body and the love he could give you for all the time you have together, but keep it all in here because we don’t want to think about it. They don’t want to see something so different, which is so obviously against all of our collective past. So desperately not right.

But I want it. I have to have it. You see I cant live without love. Who on earth can live a life not theirs, but one of being completely devoid of a tender and caring lovers touch, either never to experience it, or to be so fleeting and wrong that to convulse in shameless guilt and despair and despise that you let that vicious monster out of the box. How on Gods earth can you live with a giant crunched down inside you? It cannot be shoved down beneath your consciousness for the rest of your breaths. How can it, how could you do that. Actively live a life of death. Just a shell, just a broken can of a shell that is going to crumble under the weight of illicit thoughts one day.

Or it will, just like a devilish monster in a fairytale; it will rip its way out through your gut, and catch and kill the nearest thing it can get its hands on. People must have tried for all time to control the beast. Let it out once in a while; let it out, but only when no one is watching. Don’t let anyone see the monster. Because when someone sees that you have a monster, then you are singled out, feared and hated and despised by all sorts around this world that this monster picked you. People can say it is going to go away, or they can say you have to ignore it, or they can try and tear the beast out of your sinews, but it never goes away.

There is only one way to survive. You have to let the beast out. Have is not strong enough to describe how much of a necessity it is that this monster is let out to do its own thing. You see the moment you acknowledge you have monster, the sooner you realise its there, and not going anywhere, ever, and no matter what the people say around the planet, some people have monsters and some don’t, but you do. And you see, the very second you say hello to the beast, and acknowledge that it is there, it goes away, never to return as something you should be afraid of.

It is gone forever, the monster, the beast, the all consuming hatred and rage and fear and want, the disgusting want that tears and scratches at your mind till it drives you to insanity, it just goes away, slips into your being, when you say its there. Not a monster no more, not a sin or a cruel trick, just you, what you are and forever will be. Just a part of you. Just nothing else to worry about, its just that you had a beast, but you defeated it invincibly just by knowing it was there. You aren’t giving in to it, you aren’t letting it win, lying down for it to tramp all over you, the exact opposite, you beat it, you win because you control it. You are gay. Everyone knows it now. So what does it matter now. You’ve won the battle for your life. Everyone can say anything, a million things and a half about a thousand and a half centuries of a civilisation about a man that loves a woman. They can say it all, but it doesn’t matter. All of them are completely and utterly afraid. They do not know this beast, they have absolutely no idea what it is or how to control it, so they fight it forever, they shout at it and thy call it a sin, this beast. Or they have the beast, somewhere deep inside them, and they think they can win by attacking it head on, with words and fists and laws, but it wont go away for them, because the beast has beat them. But for us, us who have conquered the shadowy fear of lies, know we are winners, we know we have won our own personal battles, and unlike the millions who fear it, unlike a million decades of our way of life, we know who we are, and we can never be afraid to say so, we can never shake or waiver from the one true thing we know. We have it, a love to give, an amazing life to live with someone who is of our same sex, and we know it because one day, a little while ago, we won the war for our minds. And I can never forget that, you must always remember that we are stronger. Love, a necessity of life; that we are proud of the battle we have won, and we know who we are, and I know who I am and I know who I love and I am the same as you so let me live, a million years gone and a million more to come, and all the grace of God and all the power of collective humanity is screaming let me be, for I have won, for I am proud of what I have accomplished, and just let me live.

Jesus Camp and the Second American Revolution

2006-09-18T15:01:00.000-07:00

There is a story on abc about young children being indoctrinated in 'Jesus Camp.'
http://abcnews.go.com/Video/play...ndex? id=2456227
Very young children are being taught to worship George Bush, and are being trained to die for some sort of 'Christian Army.' It is very sick, and very wrong, and reminds me of a story I read about Iran recently.

During the Iran-Iraq war (1980-1988), sawthes of young children had a fundamentalist brand of Islam taught to them, I suppose simmilar to this fundamentalist brand of Christainity, and the children were then told to walk across minefields laid down by the Iraqis, to clear the way for Iranian troops.

Surely there has got to be a lawyer, somewhere, who could argue a decent case against this in court? Is there no legislator who can propose a law to stop very young, very vulnerable kids being taught extreme political views? But I guess killing people for Christ isnt considered extreme anymore.

As a first year American Studies student at University, it seems to me, that the people who forged the ideal of America, were a small band of radicals for their time, fighting against the injustices and attacks on liberty of an Imperialist superpower, who forged a concept of Democracy without the intolerances of religion or the feroucious hatred of a moral police anywhere to be seen.

Now to have a President whoes colonial ambitions strech the world over, who brings extreme religion to the front and centre of eveything he does, and who is worshiped by cults, is surley not quite in line with what the framers had in mind?

The one question which the public, nor the media, asks potential leaders, and one which should be the most important in regards to the continutation of the American Experiment:
"What would the Founding Fathers think of your policies?"
If there is a politician out there who can merley repeat the words and ideas of Washington or Adams or Jefferson or even Lincoln, then surley that will be the begining of the Second American Revolution.

Civil Rights

2005-11-01T10:00:00.000-08:00

I read an article today on Foxnews.com by a former Democratic representative called Martin Frost, about how great America is because of the civil rights movement and oh, how much freedom people of all colours, races genders and lifystyles now enjoy in the United States. I reminded the poor, dillusional man with an email.
(article - http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,174090,00.html)

Dear Mr Frost

The United States may have come leaps and bounds in trying to end racial prejudice against the African American community, but America still seems intent in pushing ahaead with prejudice against the Gay community. I believe at the last count 18 states have constitutional amendments against the right of gay people to marry; the President tried to introduce a constitutional amendment which would bar gay people from their rights of equal treatment, as guaranteed under the 14th amendment. The arguments used against gay marriage are the exact same as were used against interracial marriage.

It is not acceptable to be openly racist towards black people, but it still seems to be open season on the Gay community. State after state, judge after judge and pastor after pastor try and make life untolerable for gay people; they take away their rights and their libertys which the African American community experienced 50 years ago.

You may say the traditional civil rights movement cannot be compared to the struggle for acceptance of gay people, but I say injustice is injustice. Civil rights movements are not begining to end struggles, they are endless campaigns to take those remaining behind the lines of inequality to freedom.

Yours sincerely,

Nick Henderson

Now Comes the Fight

2005-10-31T11:31:00.000-08:00

A few minutes ago, George Bush announced that Samuel Alito is his new nominee to replace the deciseve swing vote held by Justice O'connor. In this nomination, Bush has shown his hatred for all Americans who do not subscribe to his neo-facist, extreme far right Christainity. He has reduced the number of women on the court by 50%, refused to nominate an ethnic minority, and has nominated someone whoes philosophy is one of hate. We must begin the fight to have this 'Scalia clone' withdraw his nomination as soon as possible. He is under-qualified in the fact that his opinions and rulings are immature, offensive and derogatory to women and minorities.
We succeeded in removing the nomination of Miers, whom Bush nominated so that he would have a friendly face on the court should he be impeached, which he obviousley thinks could happen.

A Justice on the Third circuit court of Apeeals, out of New Jersey, here is a round up of his far right charachter, such as demanding that women tell thier husbands if they are to have an abortion.

Samuel Alito
Age: 55
Graduated from: Yale Law School.
He clerked for: Judge Leonard Garth.
He used to be: deputy assistant attorney general under Reagan, U.S. Attorney for the District of New Jersey.
He's now: a judge on the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 3rd Circuit (appointed 1990).
His confirmation battle: Alito has the Scalia-esque nickname "Little Nino" and the Italian background to match it.
As the author of a widely noted dissent urging his court to uphold restrictions on abortion that the Supreme Court then struck down, in a decision that reaffirmed Roe v. Wade, Alito could be especially filibuster-prone. Like Scalia, he frequently makes his mark in dissent.

Separation of Church and State

For a unanimous panel, upheld a lower-court order requiring a school district to allow a Bible-study group to set up an information table at an elementary-school back-to-school night. Reasoned that by preventing the group from displaying its literature, the district was discriminating on the basis of viewpoint. (Child Evangelism Fellowship of N.J., Inc. v. Stafford Township School District, 2004)
For a unanimous panel, denied standing to a group seeking to take down a municipal holiday display that included a menorah and a crèche. Alito said that the group couldn't challenge the display as taxpayers because the items were donated rather than bought by the town. (ACLU-NJ v. Township of Wall, 2001)
Dissented from a ruling by the 3rd Circuit as a whole that an elementary school did not violate the First Amendment rights of a kindergartener by taking down (and then putting back up) a Thanksgiving poster he'd made that said the thing he was most thankful for was Jesus. The majority decided to throw out the case on a technicality; Alito protested that the child's claim should go forward. (C.H. v. Oliva, 2000)

Criminal Law

Allowed a federal probation office in Delaware to condition the release of a man who had pleaded guilty to receiving child pornography on his willingness to submit to random polygraph tests about whether he'd had impermissible contact with children. (United States v. Warren, 2003)
Dissented from a refusal to grant police officers immunity from a civil suit brought by a mother and her 10-year-old daughter who'd each been strip-searched because they lived in the home of a suspected drug dealer. Alito felt the police had behaved reasonably because the warrant led them to conclude that there was probable cause to search everyone in the house for drugs. (Doe v. Groody, 2004)

Habeas Corpus

Granted the habeas claim of an African-American defendant who sought to introduce evidence that a juror made a racist remark after the jury reached its verdict. (Williams v. Price, 2003)

Abortion

Dissented from a decision holding that Pennsylvania could not require women to inform their husbands before getting abortions. Alito argued that because the law only required the husbands to have notice and did not give them a veto over their wives' decisions, it did not pose an "undue burden" for women. This approach was rejected by the Supreme Court. (Planned Parenthood v. Casey, 1991)

Agreed that an immigration judge was within his discretion to find not credible an application for asylum based on China's forced-abortion policy. (Xue-Jie Chen v. Ashcroft, 2004)

Victory, but for who?

2005-10-27T20:39:00.000-07:00

Harriet Miers withdrew her nomination for the Supreme Court today, with whoops of 'got the bitch' from myself, but who is this a victory for?

Harriet Miers nomination confused a lot of people. There was definitely no clarity on the issues at hand. One could see evidence of her being a staunch right winger, then there was hints of gay rights, or at least no fire and brimstone comments against gays.

Right wing conservatives certainly did not like her nomination. They didn't like the fact that they couldn't prove she was a conservative through a paper trail, and Bush told the country we 'had to trust him' in picking someone who shared his political and judicial philosophy, which obviously many far righters were not prepared to do.

But are we to take from this, however, that she was not a clear cut far right conservative? Bush said she shared his philosophy, which has been proved to be of the far right persuasion, ala the now dead Defense of Marriage amendment, the Patriot act and tax cuts for the rich. However, Democratic Minority leader Senator Harry Reid praised her nomination, and even today blamed far right religious fanatics in the republican party for trampling on Harriet Miers nomination. So was Harriet the best liberal appeasement we could have expected from the Bush White House? Will Bush now appoint a clear cut Far Righter such as Edith Jones or Priscilla Owen? Or will Bush take this as the opportunity to appoint a real consensus candidate such as Edith Clement or even possibly Alberto Gonzales, who has shown to be moderate in teen abortions anyway, but has been criticized by Democrats for his approval of torture and of the unconstitutional 'Patriot Act'?

The shortlived Harriet Miers nomination, however, could also highlight the complete incompetentcy of the Bush administration in proposing a candidate which angers his base, has absolutely zero judicial experience, a limited knowledge of Constitutional law, and an inherent bias and questionable independence in dealing with any case which involved the Bush administration.

Miers owed just about every job she has had to George Bush, and would also have owed her place in US history and to become one of the most important women in America to Bush, thus compromising her ability to be independent should a case arise involving Bush, or should Bush ever appear before the Supreme Court after being impeached.

Could Bush have been so stupid? It is almost unbelievable that Bushes brain, Karl Rove, would have let him pick a person like this. Rove must have known that she would have been contentious to the Republican base despite Bushes' continued pleas that she believes the same things as him, and her being religious. Puting aside the total uncostitutional factor in nominating someone because of their 'religious belief's' why on earth would he have wanted to have someone controlling the Swing Vote on the Supreme Court who's only qualification was that she was an ally?

In a seemingly unrelated story, Washington is waiting to hear who is going to be indicted in the CIA-Plame case. Karl Rove, the man behind Bush and Scooter Libby, Cheney's CoS, are likely to become criminal defendants. It may become clear during their trial, if they are indicted, that it was the Vice President himself who authorized the leak, as it seems unbelievable that Libby or Rove would be able to authorize this, and as Libby received information from Cheney just before he met with reporters. It seems even more unlikely to me that Dick Cheney would have leaked the name without even informing the President.

So if we hypothetically follow this leak up the chain of command, there is the possibility that Bush was aware of, or authorized the leaking of Plames name as a CIA agent to discredit her husband, a harsh critic of the Presidents Iraq policy. Therefore were this to come out in any criminal case involving Rove and Libby, the President would face impeachment at the hands of the Supreme court, and of course, it would be in the Presidents intrestes to have an Associate Justice who owed everything she had to Bush.

Now of course this is all just an idea, but it is an idea that makes sense to me. I don't understand why Bush would nominate someone who so angered his base, and got approval from Democrats otherwise? Where is that Political Capital he promised to spend in appointing a hardline ideologue? But an ideologue who is against abortion is possibly not someone who is in favour of Presidents breaking the law to discredit political opposition.

In summary, I believe the President, George W. Bush authorized the leak of Valerie Plames name, and then nominated Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court to protect his back as the Special Prosecutor, Patrick Fitzgerald, closed in on the top White House staff.

The withdrawal of Miers nomination may not be directly related to this, however, as conservatives disliked her anyway, and many people questioned her experience, or total lack of. But I think the withdrawal does represent a huge blow to the safety of Bush in the CIA case, and a President in trouble. A Victory, perhaps, for all the Bushwhacker Liberals out there who want to see Bush exposed and convicted for the criminal he is.

Sooner or Later...Iran

2005-10-26T15:51:00.000-07:00

President Mahmoud Ahmandinejad today called for the State of Israel to be "wiped of the map" on the same day that suicide bombers again struck the Jewish State. These comments are horrid and evil, and a totally obvious incitement for Islamic Jihad, Hamas and the Iranian group Hezbollah to attack Israel and its people with all the ferocity it has seen in the past. This is completley and totally unnaceptable. For a head of state to say that another sovreign nation to be destroyed is a public warning in the straightest of terms to prepare for war, and another holocaust of Jews in their own nation, by a hardline controlled Iran.

When Ahmandinejad won the election, a man whoes opinion I greatly respect, Sky New's foreign affairs editor Tim Marshall, said that although this man was a hardliner, we shouldnt expect to see him declaring war on Israel right away. Well it looks like the time has come.

As we all know, Iran has had some Nuclear problems. It says it is for peaceful purposes, but I had my doubts, as did many, many people. I truly believe this is why Iran is trying to develop nuclear weapons, to attack Israel, and as the President has so openly stated, to wipe it off the map.

So what can actaully be done about Iran? It is a very difficult issue. There is no chance of action in the UN. Bush wouldnt think about it, and Putin is still playing cold war politics in supporting Syria and Iran.

I highly doubt the world could stomach another Iraq in its neighbour. Britain could not go to war with Iran. It could not be done by the Labour party without Labour destroying itself. Just rember the opposition we had in the UK to involvement in Iraq, and the protests would be doubelled, they would certanily bring down the government. If Blair was still there when the Iranian issue reachd a head, he really couldnt put his name to another of what people would see as 'Bushes wars.' Indeed, Jack Straw has said that action against the Islamic Republic is 'inconcievable.'

However, I think Iran, unlike Iraq at the time, represents a great danger to the world, as well as its people. Iraq was a threat to itself, and i still think we did the right thing in going into Iraq, allthough totally for the wrong reasons. To say that we should get rid of Saddam because he is an evil dictator, yes, i agree, but the 45 minute claim, and everything else, well, lets not get into that, but in short, Britain, and Europe especialy, will not follow America into a pre-emptive war against Iran

Iran does represent a danger to its people through its hardline government. I saw a picture of two young boys recently being hung for homosexuality. Disgusting. I cant bring myself to talk anymore about that issue, its too, too horible.

Iran represents a dager to the world, and more specificly, Israel. If Iran got the bomb, that would certanily be extremley dangerous, although I am confident Isreal would do everything in its power to prevent that, and I have no doubt that Isrealis and Americans are working tirelessly in Iran to prevent that.

There is a limit to what can be done through espionage and diplomacy however. And the latter seems to be getting us nowhere. We then have to come to the conclusion that Iran will eventually become nuclear capable, which then leaves us with few options.

The most obvious I think, would be Special Forces targetting Nuclear facilities, possibly with Isreali air strikes to surgically cripple Irans nuclear arsenal, but this could prove a diplomatic nightmare, possibly full scale war with Iran, and if even one missile was not destroyed, it would leave Isreal vulnerable. However I think this sort of action might propmt Iran to invade Irag, or at least the Shia areas anyway, and be possibly welcomed by the overwhelming Shia majority there. Iran has already proven a tit for tat ideaology to foreign affairs. Diplomatic pressure vis a vis the nuclear issue resulted in the deaths of British soldiers at the hands of Iran, and then the bombings in south western Iran, which their government acused the UK of involvement in, which is certanily a possibility. Therefore a crippling of Irans nuclear weapons program could see the Revolutionary Guard rolling across the oilfields of Basra, with pictures of cheering crowds on the TV.

The second option is a full scale inviasion of Iran, and thus another Iraq. This could in no way be done untill Iraq is stabilised, which could be a long way away. The British and Americans just dont have the non-consciption manpower to launch that kind of inviasion. And as I doubt we would get involved anyway, America would have to go it alone, and I cant see Bush getting away with introducing conscription to pre-emptivley invade Iran, i think it is inconcievable. The backlish would be astounding. It would just prove that all opposition has been stamped out in America if Bush could pull that off. The only way we could handle Iran millitarily is through a totally worldwide coalition. With UN, Russian, European, even Chinese support, and the only way I can see that happening is if Iran attacks Israel with Nuclear weapons. By then it could be too late, and Isreal may have been wiped off the map, as Mahmoud Amedinejad wants. However I am sure Isreal would respond in kind, which would blow up the powder keg that the middle east has been every day for so long.

I cant see anyway to peacefully resolve this issue soon. The Iranian president has fired off a warning shot, and we have to respond in kind. Jack Straw is going to give an Iranian diplomat a telling off, but Nato should admit Isreal in, thus giving Iran a clear signal that if they were to attack Isreal, then the force of the free world will bear down on it.

However things, as they usually are, will be far more murky than that, with Iran supporting more terrorist attacks against the Jewish State and British troops, while Jack Straw gives them a right seeing too, but, sooner or later, we have to deal decisevley with Iran.

Hyperbole

2005-10-25T15:56:00.000-07:00

Someone once commented on my use of millions of hyperboles, so heres my best one. To put it in context, this is how much sum cool chick i was once good friends with smoked...

not even a 19th century steel mill with columns of children with sooted faces marching in for work to create the largets oceanliner the world has ever seen and working at it for 19years dya in day out till they reach the point of exhaustian and are thrown into the furnace could equall the Co2 output of my aileen!

I consider it a fine piece of wit? (hehe...geddit?)

...Personal Update...

2005-10-25T15:27:00.000-07:00

Well The DeLay post below has been my first one in months, and i heartily apologise to my fan. But I am back, at least for a while, to spouting liberal bile into the WWW with every despicable, anti-bush feeling in my same-sex liking body.

Anyway ill let you know what ive been doing. Did pretty good in my exams! 2 A's and 2 B's!! failed french though...ahh well, je ne ce...eh...no wonder i failed ay? But me got on A im Engblish! Woohoo! and in History of course, i still reckon i got full marks like i did in the prelim (go the poof)

And another big addition, well the addition of the other half of my mind, heart, body and soul. The wonderful, adorable, gorgous Scott! My Australian boyfriend!

Well in the summer, just after i stopped posting probably, went to Australia, Perth, in WA on holiday with ma dad, step mum and wee bro adam. During our time their i just fell in love with the place, its so gorgous, so amazing. So i decided to stay for three months, as my visa permitted, and maybe travlel round oz, then my dad has a friend who owns a bar in spain in which i could work in too. So i decided to take a year out before Uni to live my life in other places. I was getting fed up of Glasgow, although i didnt get to go like clubbing and pubbing all the time their, coz i wasnt 18, i have been to some clubs in glasgow, such as Fury Murrys and Bennets, and I know what their like. Entertaining, but really fufilling. And I was going from boyfriend to boyfriend and i just couldnt find the right person.

As it turns out, the right person was on the other side of the world, and actually at that particualr time, three weeks before we met, was telling his friends he would love to have a boyfriend with a scottish or irish accent. Well babe, hows this : "Alrighty their, ah pihnt of Guiness an' wheres mhe loocky charms?

Anyway despite the best efforts of laura and andy and angy and nicola and clairey and the rest to get me to come home, home is now a nice new flat in South Perth, WA, Australia. With my amazing boyfriend, and may i say, my last boyfriend ever, Scott.

Im in Glasgow right now, had to come back about a month ago coz i was kicked out of my stepmums dads house coz i was gay, and couldnt stay at scotts parents forever, altho they were so nice in puttin me up, anyway, will be taking off from Glasgow Airport on the 13th november for a life with Scott, a job with Greenpeace, and the world at my feet.

Dont DeLay, Convict Today!

2005-10-25T14:57:00.000-07:00

Former Republican House Majority Leader Tom Delay, as we all know, is facing trial on charge of laundering money through the national Republican party to Texas legislators campaigns. Because of this, the GOP managed to take the Texan state congress, then gerrymandered out of all proportion the boundouries so it would be near impossible for the Democrats to take back the Texan legislative assembleys.

On the face of it, this is a totally and absolutley abhorrent crime to commit. Getting elected through illegal campaign funds, then changing the rules of the game to hold on to power. Tbis could be true os some third world country, but surley not the United States of America?

What makes this seem even worse, is that the perpetrator was until recently, the Majority Leader of the House of Representatives of the United States! One of the most important jobs in the nation, on of the most influential and the one with great responsibilitys to the nation, and the job was held by a man who has commited crimes against Democracy, and wishes to deny the political opposition their voice, which is true of many, many dictators, not least some in the Republican Party.

That should not, must not be the way business is conducted in the United States; its just not on.
And not only this, with the trial starting, DeLay has demanded a new judge because Judge Bob Perkins, a supporter of Kerry, the Democrats and MoveOn.org, is a supporter of Kerry, the Democrats and MoveOn.org!!

THAT is also not how we do buisness in America. First of all, a judge must apply the law, as it is written, fairly, accuratley, and punnish appropriatley those who break the law. This demand for a new judge, and the fact that the demand is being taken seriousley, has vast and scary consequences for America. It suggests that a republican judge may throw out the case, or a democrat judge would give too harsh a punnishment. And it seems to me if the former Majority Leader believes that having judges of different political view points will produce different results, then the judiciary is not independent or fair. And that is really not on.

Does this mean a Republican supporting judge would hand out the death penalty to say, a teenage first offence drunk driving conviction because the judge wanted to make an example? That is really not fair, that is obvious. Judges, in their work, cannot, under any circumstances, take politics into account, or take their own feelings on a matter into account. IT IS NOT FAIR.

This also stems to the Supreme Court nominee, Harriet Miers. She has not been a judge before, and Bush has actually said that he has nominated her for her religious and moral stances, not for her ability to judge and apply the constitution. So why does he think he can do this? Why can he rip the bottom out of the idea of liberty and justice for all in America? That, however, is a different rant.

Rep. Tom DeLay is the personification of what is going wrong in Bushes America. The Judge cannot be repalced, as Democrats understand the idea of fair trials. If DeLay hasnt done anything wrong, he has nothing to fear from a liberal judge. However, I am going to skip the trial and give my verdict that DeLay is guilty, although this is not a legal opinion, only a personal opinion based on facts given by the newsmedia, and he should be convicted without Delay.

ME and LAURA!

2005-06-29T03:49:00.000-07:00

Edinburgh!

2005-06-29T03:43:00.000-07:00

Abortion

2005-05-24T17:48:00.000-07:00

Men should really not be able to define what a woman can and cant do with her body. having a baby is such a life changing experience for a woman. they are emotionaly, and, is suppose phsyically attatched to their babies. a man can walk out, as they often do. A 16 year old girl who gets pregnant has a life wrenching decision infront of her. How can someone that young give a child a life?its praticlly impossible.

Abortion is the only way out for some people. can you not see that?I just cant get how some people can be so against this, for some sort of religious ideal. Religion is all very well and good. The helping and caring and shit, but sometimes i think its head is in the clouds. look at the real world. kids can get pregnant. So what are they ment to do? its really which life do you sacrafice, yours or a small lump inside you. I agree that abortion is a horrible, horrible thing for anyone to go through. It tears out your heart and it rips out your soul, for ages and ages. but the alternative for some people is far worse. What if your parents are such that they would kick you out of the house, and you could end up destitute in some hostel with your kid. what life is that for either? and thats why i think abortions should be secret for kids aswell. How would yout think conservative parents would react to an abortion? far worse than a pregnancy i can tell you.Its great to have morals and everything, but i think this debate is missing the real life aspect of this. Abortion is sometimes the only way. Its choosing between two lives. your or the babies.

So before you dismiss abortion as evil etc. take one second to think of the people it affects. the lives children change. And they change it so much. forget education, forget a decent job and wage, forget going out and having fun, forget going holiday. forget having a life. People shoudl only have children wen they feel their ready for it.

Abortion, another stance on the Great Debate

2005-05-24T17:46:00.000-07:00

Filibuster, the End of America

2005-05-23T12:57:00.000-07:00

Tonight could mark the end of liberty and democracy in the United States of America.

Tonight, Bush and Frist will demand a vote to get rid of the filibuster in judicial apointments.

Tonight, if the resolution is passed, absolute and subjective rule by one group of people will be completed over the other group.

Tonight, Liberty could die...through thunderous applause.

The one thing about a mature democracy is minority rights. The right of a political minority to live the way they want. Blue citizens in america are officialy the minority. What makes a blue citizen? Abortion rights, gay rights, the teaching of evolution, secularism, freedom of speech? And what happens when the other sideo obtains total rights over the other? They will put their rules over the other ones. The difference between the reds and the blues is that blue means liberty, and red doesnt. That is undisputable. Right wing christianity, i.e. all christians in america, does not promote liberty, neither does denying people civil rights, or restricting freedom of speech.

So how does a minority keep their rights? Why have the blues not lost their rights sooner?
The Filibuster. The thing which protects the rights of any either minortiy. and to break requires aproval from both sets. 60 votes to break a filibuster, and neither party has, or will have in the near future, 60 votes in the senate. And so even the threat of a filibuster will make the other side sit down and talk to the other side, to discuss and debate and to keep fundamental rights.

Fundamental rights will disapear, however, with no opposition to say hold on, wait a second. Bush has for the past four years been slowly destroying american libertys of equality and liberty. 'You either with us or against us' only a fool speaks in black and white. You cant negotiate in black and white, you cant give way, you cant see the other point of view, nor can you even possibly begin to be a half decent leader, a half decent leader understands the fact that beaing a leader mean leading the whole country, not just the half that votes for you.

I feel very sorry for the blue, liberty and freedoms loving people of america, fot their liberty is slipping right infront of their eyes, and to speak up is to be 'un-patriotic'.

To question is to be 'un-patriotic'

To debate is to be 'un-patriotic'

To say no, to stand for what you believe, yo look at the facts, to discuss and to keep freedom, is to be un patriotic in red america, a red america burning in its own man made hell. Liberty, freedom, is on the out in the USA.

And the fact that the filibuster for judicial nominees is now, probably going to be gone, i feel afraid for the america we thought we knew.

Bush has got through over 200 of his judges, only about 10 are in contention. more than any president in modern history. And with the end of the filibuster, the senate will become a rubber stamp for american judges, who are very, very powerful. more powerful than congress, as they must vote. Judges sit on the bench and impose the doctrine which put them their onto the nation.

Now the senate is voting to basically give the president the power to apoint judges without contention. Totally unconstitutional, but thats realpolitik for you.

'Vote the chancellor emergency powers!' came the cry from the galactic senate. 'vote him more emergency powers! less deabte! we are at war, we must have one strong leader'
As so says Star Wars III. A voygae from freedom loving republic, to facist empire. smoothly, voted away.

Nazi Germany, intelligent republic, voted away their freedom.

The senate will become a rubber stamp for Bushes judges, and it wont stop there, filibusters for other things will be voted away, soon, a simple 51 majority in the senate, a majority in the house and a republican president will mean that the minority will be irrelevant. Total majortiy rule.

It would be alright if it was the Democrats, as Blues know how to keep freedom and liberty, that is wat they stand for. Republicans, Theological dictatorship.

When Gore was robbed, A little bit of America died.

When the patriot act was blindly agreed to, A little bit of America died.

When Iraq was invaded on a lie, with anyone who mumbeled the slightest thing against labelled a traitor, A little bit of America died.

When the rigged election of 2004 ment Kerry lost, A liitle bit of America died.

And tonight, if the Filibuster goes, America, Liberty, Justice, Peace, Equality, Freedom, will be dead.

'So this is how liberty dies, with thunderous aplause.'

Oh no! tomorrow morning!

2005-05-16T08:58:00.000-07:00

AHHHH!!! WHY CANT I STUDY!!!

Higher fucking french is tomorrow and I cannot study! Oh well! to hell with it, Im telling myslef I will concentrate on bio but thats a laugh too. So Ill write this post.

News update: Im 17 now and ive just about booked my driving lessons!! Im going to get intensive lessons for next week so i should be driving like really soon yay! Matty will be arriving next monday too! woohoo! and i still need to clean the upstairs bedroomfrom the party...eh weeks ago! yeah theres still fag/glass/ashtrays all over the the place, and the irn bru is...well yeah all over the floor still.

So anyways! everyone is having boy touble excpet me coz i dont have any boys on the go! Me and ally met up with a supposedly cute guy on saturday nite at the scene, except he turned out to be a fairly soso big headed homophobic asshole! so thats hether wypers friends for ya! (and he was wearing shorts, shorts!)

Claire is seeing an 18 year old falkirkian bucky in the woods drinking speedway racing fireman. They have been out about twice, yet they argue and shout at each other like a married gay couple. Seriousley! before they had even met, claire was at mine, screaming at him to fuck off down the fone, at ten minutes later they were talking to each other like lovers! it blows ur fucking mind! And, to make matters worse, David, the other sleaze, claires sleazy, seedy player ex bf, who has made a girl abort his baby and is probably so ridden its unbelievable, texted her saying how much he loved her! he is the biggest mofoin player. dont ever, ever trust david!

And aileen, god knows, actually godknows! the bold slim, asda worker and tit aparantley wants her, and local 26 year old sleaze bag who lives next to OUR SCHOOL wants her BAD.! irronically he is called dave the sleaze. plus there is the bold podgy, a fat uberwanking weirdo wholikes foning aildee at 2 in the morning with his knob in his hand.thankfully she told him to go get a stairmaster!

So anyways, tomorrow, the night before the biology exam (yeah! i know!) me and ally are gayin it up at avril lavigne concert baby!! ive seen her before, but this time it will be great! im paintin ma nails and allys dyin her hair black!! were going to be total emo chicks! avril is mofoin coool!

But ive got a big ugly stress spot on ma neck! its minging! ill just put fuckloadsa make up on it.
FUCK FRENCH EXAM TOMORROW MORNING! AND IVE JUST WASTED AN HOUR TALKING TO YOU PEOPLE!

Oil-For-Food

2005-05-16T04:27:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow we will see that bastard george galloway testifying befoe the senate. This man. i dont know where to start. anti-semite, arrogant, racist, arogant, a traitor, pig, arrogant, a total bastard. a man who used voter intimidation and anti jewish sentiments to get rid of one of the only black women in parliament, and a great MP, Oona King. she is gone, and the traitor galloway, a man who took kickbacks from saddam, who saluted saddams masscres. who took money from saddam to spy on britain for saddam. I know he sued the daily telegraph for printing that. BUT IM SAYING IT TOO! i dont care that it was 'proved'to be false, maybe that document was false, the rest of its true. GEORGE GALLOWAY TOOK MONEY FROM SADDAM TO SPY ON THE UK. GEORGE GALLOWAY IS A TRAITOR! SUE ME GEROGE, FUCKING SUE ME!.

i do apologise for that outburst, i just totally despise the 'man'. When britain was at war with iraq, briatin was in a stae of war. and galloway told people to kill british troops. if thats not treason, what is? he should have been tried, for treason.

and i hope once its proved he took these millions of barrels of oil from saddam, he will be tried for treason, booted out of parliament, and into belmarsh to rot.

But i think its amazing, that a legislatory of a country can call a legislator of another to testify. And even though george issuch a bastard, its really funny watching him speak, i think the word god complex doesnt even come close to describing him. both george and the senators will both be thinking that they are better than each other. it will be funny to watch them bring each other down a peg. cant wait! and throw that bastard into the slammer! give him a a tste of guantanamo.

Past and Present

2005-05-15T17:51:00.000-07:00

I awoke with a start one sticky summer night,
along ago evening, or so I was believing,
and the sun was far from making the morning bright.

When I though it was the past,
I heard her breathing, her hands were feeling,
but the future was just
my beautiful dreaming.
I was back there, back in my old life being.

The hair was flowing, over the pillow
like a Godess and was glowing,
her cheek face redded,
after I had bedded.
My soul was ledded.

Just the same night while she was
snoring
I thought i heard her say someones name
whispered silently under her mouth
under her mind
under sight
under ground.
And i would tell her when she awoke
To a shouting match I would evoke
But too far, it was to be,
All I heard her say, was
marry me.

Oh Shit, I laid there saying.
I dont want to be this feeling,
feel like grieving.

Later on, or earlier, I dont know.
Like a prisoner in the solitary cage
consciousness uneeded.
Memory like the CD skipping.
Anyway, too close beside me
Her breath was quickening,
softly bringing
herself to whatever.
And I was sweating, crowded on top.
Alone in the room but covers
bunched round to make it hot and
really hot. Really warm and sweating
This night was never ending.

Toes running over the cold steel
that kept us shagging, even though I was sagging,
And then I prayed it wasnt real.

Why does it always happen.
Why do things happen to you, me?
Why did you hurt your arm?
Why did you fall asleep?
Why did you find this girl?
Doesnt it strike you as a little odd?
That everything that happens to you...
Happens to you?

When did our lives become a story?
Where did the Everlasting put in the next twist?
Why does it all happen.
When did the glass come up,
the glass that I cant break, or breathe.

Will I keep on? Fucking her?
Find out after the break,
Buy the next book,
Find out in the next life.
I cant remeber.

It happened in so many epsiodes.
Of that life.
Isnt our life divided into epsiodes? Each day,
days, crammed to a half hour of memory.
Felt like somethings building up.
All the plotlines were thickening.
We were all waiting for the end,
The climax. When did it come?

I want a sneak preview, I want to
see what happend next.

But for now i know where I am. (thank fuck)
Im sitting here smoking, while shes choking (on his cock)
And here in the present, I am. (I suck!)

VE? Dont want to catch that!

2005-05-13T15:30:00.000-07:00

The 60th VE day celebrations in Moscow last week is probably the last milestone in which a significant number of veterans will see. To remeber the time when the Allies deafeated the greatest evil the world has yet seen, Bush, Putin, Chirac and even Shroeder were all in the fron row, as they should have been. Allies were allies, and no matter how these countries drift apart, we will always remeber the time when we bound together to deafeat Hitler.

Britain was the last outpost of freedom in Europe during the war. Constantly bobmbed, we made a huge sacrifice, and who was there to represent the UK? That last bastion of freedom in Europe during the darkest days? The head of State, the Queen? No. The heir apparant, Prince Charles, even?The prime Minister, even? NO! not even the godamn foreign secretary. The fucking deputy PM, john prescott. Mr nothern pie 2005, was standing at the back row. So while a couple of dictators, (bush and Putin) were standing swaping storys of locking up dissedents, Blairs impotent lapdog stands at the back sampling the stroganoff.

I thik this is a totally appaling way to celebrate the return of freedom to europe. We all know, despite holywood, if britain had fallen to the nazis, then the world would be very, very different.
If we had lost the battle of brita9in, and remeber, that was down to only a few planes, and a few very brave men and women, then we would have definetley seen a Nazi britain. and what would have america done if that happened in 1941? FDR, who was not in the war then, would have stayed away from europe.
Even if pearl harbour had happened then, america would have just gone after japan. No way would america be able to take on the japanese, as well as a europe conquered by hitler.

It was down to us, the UK, to svae the world from the gerans 60 years ago.We all know that. and this is how we remeber it.
Where is the parades through london? where are the union jacks decking every corner? where was anything?

why was the most inportant event in modern history, totally forgotten in this country? its a total slap in the face to our WW2 veterans.

This is one of the things i hate about britain. we forget and consign to nothing the most importnat events in our history. I bet, well, for me anyway, if there was a parade, or a holiday every year celebrating the act of union, or the union of the crowns or SOMETHING, i would not be nationalist. it is the forgetting of this history that pisses me off. Last year was the 400th anniversary of the union of the crowns, and what happened? nothing. We dont remeber our history, or use our heritage for celebration.

Frankly, the same goes with Law. Magna Carta was a document to give the barons their rights against the tyrant King John. in the 18th century, lawyers used magna carta to create these fundamental rights for the common man, the foundation fo our democracy. earlier this year, Blair tried to pass contraversial legislation that totally ignored the 39th clause i think of magna carta, about protecting peoples rights and freedoms unless they were arreste and tried.But the government ignored this. The law lords ignored this!" just because it happened 800 years ago, doesnt mean it is not important! or relevant!we need a supreme court and a wriiten constitution for this country, so our sacred freedoms do not go to pot.!

Tjhat is, for all the rest of its faults, one of the great things about america. The written constitution, interpreted like gods own law. a supreme court justice would have no qualms, i would hope, in striking down a piece of government legislation which was unconstitutional. Wheras here a high court judge would not dare overule the parliament. we need a change of focus in britain. Parliament developed in opposition to the executive, which was the king. now the executive is the prime minister, which parliament is in support of! there are not enough checks and balances here, but at least our britishness keeps us from doing anything stupid.

the reason americans are so celebratory about their holidays, is that their ideals are drummed into them from kindergarten. maybe if ours were to, then we wouldnt have so much apathy, and so many young people saying, 'VE? isnt that an STD?'

10 hours...45 minutes...

2005-05-12T14:13:00.000-07:00

In little under 10 hours, 45 mins, i, along with every other 5th year in scotland, will be sitting the english higher. It requires the ability to think on your feet, and the memory of quotations from various forms of literature. From my texts this morning i have concludded that people in my class will be learning hamlet, at least two poems, and one more short story, usually the black cat. I, however,in two days have learned hamlet and two peoms. have not written any analysis, nor done any practice essays under exam conditiions. Should i have done? Definetley. Did i want to? no.

I need 4 B's from this. At the moment i am siting on 2 A's, 2 dodgy B's, and a fail. So what if tomorrow i mess up? or thereis no suitable hamletor peotry question? Hopefully an appeal may work, and lift me up to a B. but if not? repeat it next year? oh well.

It is true that probably everyone else in the class has done far more work than me (with the excpetion of martin, future suicidal swiming teacher at barrhead sports centre) So what have I done with my year? very little in wrok terms. But light years socially. This time last year, I was a repressed, depressed, guy in a hetero relationship, which my family disaproved of. I hated my freinds, as so i said in that godamn reflective essay (so mofoing emabarising). I knew not of aileen, ally, laura, jill and angie or the rest of the super cool people i love. And now, well, Im OUT! love me peeps, have one of THE most interesting social lifes (dont like to blow my own trumpet, well, later anyway). and am supremely hapy?

No, but im content. Im safe. No one can be supremley happy all the time. but i do not feel depressed, nor trapped, nor ignored, i havnet felt that in a long time.

Ironically, the people who will do the best tomorrow are worrying the most. I know i will only do aswell as i have worked, which even has not been that hard over the past two days i have been off. and any better will be a total fluke.

But why get hot and bothered about the destination, and not enjoy the ride? i must say i have enjoyed the ride, very, very much so. What was i doing only weeks before the exam? Partying, my freind. getting drunk, having fun, having sex, shopping, my favourite things.

And over the past year, there are many, many times where i should have been at home, studying, but i was out, having experiences. and in the end, doesnt experience count more than a piece of paper with a grade?(which i could probably fake anyway)

So i suppose it boils down to wether the journey or the destination matters most. Many people havethis one place fixed in their minds, where they need to get to. Or they have a closer destination, for example a specific grade, where they want to get to, and will take the boring, one way train there.

Wheras i like to think that yes, i have a hazy dream over the horizon, but i dont care how i get there, or if i do. all i want is to enjoy the journey. If it turns out what i have done in the journey has led me somewhere else, i will only have myself to blame, but if i have ended up there, then i must like it, no?

for example, say i fail everything, get nothing out of school. what do i do? get a job and make some new freinds. most of the people i love are staying in glasgow. so it would be great to stay here!

and whats the best? i get all i need.have a blast next year(which i soo will anyway). move to edinburgh and have some even more new experiences.

I guess what Im saying is i dont mind about where i end up, i just dont want to regret how i get there. i want to look back on my life and say, wow, that was fun! wish i could remeber more of it.

so instead of learning another peice of literature, i will laugh me head off with good ol' boris on question time. Bring on tomorrow morning!

Hello again

2005-05-10T12:15:00.000-07:00

Am back!hes back! hold the fone! cancel the search, i have arrived.

I do apologise for my extended leave of absence. Have i been off on a romantic cruise with some new love? no. I have been in a relationship, and been out of one. I have had the worlds greatest party, and got the police round, and i have gotten my sweet revenge.

And in the world...well. Blairs in, with only 66. Oonas out, and Galloway the Shite is back in. DeLays still clining, but Howard has slipped.

And in my scene, there is new love on the horizon for claire, although the fire is getting colder for D. and matty is coming up from liverpool with a keg ofpetrol for allys fire, while laura and andy have set the sexual world alite.

Highers are days away, actually hours, dont know how many though. Well i dont want to recant my entire experiences from the past month, but i will tell u today, got hit by an egg from a third year whoes life is in extreme danger, sunbathed on a public wall with my head resting daintilly against aileens right breast.was fun! discovered gaydar radio, sky channel 908, how awazing is it??? fucking amazing! well i shall leave ye for now, while i make my oven chips, try fone D again, and recline with a fag.

But world, THE POOF HAS RETURNED!

Pope Benedict XVI

2005-04-19T16:28:00.000-07:00

So gods rotweiler has become pope. Not really a surprise. I watched the dean of the college of cardinals stand on the balcony, and the world was waiting to hear the new popes name, i was siting on the edge of my couch in excitement at who they had elected, and let out a groan when they said ratzinger.

the church had a chance to start the new reformation of the church, ending world poverty, reforming the system of the church, but in the end, they chose the arch conservative. anti gay, anti women, anti science, the catholic church is going back to its roots, and i can shed this pro church stance i have been taking, thank god.

hes a hardliner, and hardliners i dont agree with. at least he is only a transitional pope, and in a few years we will be goin back to Rome, hopefully for a better pope. Hes the most polarising and divisive figure in the catholic church, he is the chief of the thought police, master of the modern inquisition office. And i am pleased i can go back to my roots, and weve got a hate figure again. Benedict has taken the vatican back to being the antithesis of liberalism, and i dislike him, and am pleased of that fact.

Hopefully, Benedict will make his way up to the great big conservative convention in the sky soon, and the church can have a few years to mull over a more progressive candidate. and when that happens i can start thinking the church can change.

The church cant change, Papa Ratzi is a tough one, and we liberals can be just as tough.

Good ol' Rush

2005-04-17T07:36:00.000-07:00

Good ol' Rush Limbaugh. He never ceases to be one of the most offensive, stupid godamn pro christian republicans out there.

I was listening to the Al Franken show on Americas finest news source, after http://www.theonion.com, Air America Radio http://www.airamericaradio.com/ (as you can see Ive just learned how to use hyperlinks).

Anyway, Mr Franken was talking about Rush, and how when Rush was talking to Al Gore about teenagers or something, Rush saids the word blowjob on radio, in reference to the fact that all teenagers think about, is blowjobws. Well as a teenager, I can say although blowjobs are high on my agenda, very high sometimes, I can think about other things.

But the ordacity of it was that Rush blamed Bill Clinton for teaching American Teenagers about Blowjobs. Rush Limbaugh actually blamed Bill Clinton, and the fact that he, on an occaison, was lightly fellated by Monica Lewinsky. Rush fucking Limbaugh actually blamed Bill for teaching americas kids how to give blowjobs, i.e. sucking the cock, licking the stick, giving the head, popping the fruit, eating the banana, or any other innuendo you care to call it.

Rush said that all american kids in school can think of now are blowjobs. If thats true, Id love to thank Bill Clinton, for teaching a generation of kids how to suck cock, and maybe he could come over to Scotland and teach the kids hear how to give half decent blowjobs.

But how god dman stupid can you get? Yes because before Bill, No one in high school had ever, ever though about putting it there. Rush is a fucking tit, he really is, and so is everyone who actually think Abstinence teaching is a good idea. I am so oppoed to abstinence it makes me want to go out and have sex. Im not even going to get into how stupid Abstinrence is, and teaching it as the only method is even more stupid. Us teens have sex, we have alot of sex, not as much as we would like, but alot. And its politicians who havent got any since Eisenhower who are turning a generation into sickening, religious pro abstinence gun nuts. And turning the majority totally off. Normal teens in america, kids who like to get drunk, smoke, get stoned occaisonally and have sex, are now considered to lead an alternative lifestyle.

I just thank fuck that over here, us normal people are still in the majority.

Anyway, in conclusion, Rush is a total tit, Abstinence is morraly wrong in my opinion, and long live blowjobs, and our freedom to talk about them, and get them, whenever, and where ever we can.

Paula Radcliffe

2005-04-17T04:23:00.000-07:00

Oh yes, its all very well and good for bloody Paula Radcliffe.She thinks she can just run right back into our hearts and souls. Well Ive had it!

At the Olimpics. I was behind her. I was behind her all the fucking way! We were all behind her.

I...I remeber that day. I remeber it so well. We were in France, and we went down to the Sports Cafe, to watch...Im sorry this is really difficult....to watch the marathon.

We had our fucking union jacks and everything. It was perfect. All bloody perfect. Cheering, and she was just running, running.And everyone was cheering, and clapping her on for. The. Full. God. Damn. Marathon.

I rember it soo well. So well. The flagswere waving, we were singing, drinking...hugging. Then...I stopped. Everyone else was still in a rave. But i Stopped and looked. Something, it didnt look right.

I stood. Still, silentley, in a haze of the 2 hour celebration which had gone on behind me throughout the marathon. I stopped. Stopped and stared at the telly. The ash on my fag fell slowly to the ground. And...and

Paula stopped. Paul stopped. and fell to the ground. The hole bar just stood. Cried. Oh fuck we cried. Screemed at the telly. "get up paula get up!"
We all shouted at her.

A few of the people got into the car and started out straight for Athens.We saw them on the telly a few hours later. No one slept that night. We stayed in the barfor days, just cying and holding each other.Then the news came onshe might run the 10k. Butwe couldnt even get excited about that. She used us. she used us and abused us. All our fucking hopes were pinned on it! all our fucking hopes! and she let us down. the bitch. When she ran the tenk. we thought that would be better, as it went on and on, we got better and better. then she did it again. did it again.

The guys who went to athens never came back. they went to amsterdam and took advantage of the euthanasia laws. they couldnt see any point in going on. I dont blame then.

And now shes won the London Marathon, i cant do it. I cant let her back into my heart. Im not strong enough. Im not. It took too long to heal. It took too long.

That was a documentry for the BBC about the psychological effect ofPaula Radcliffe on our nations teenagers. The face of our interviewee has been blacked out to protect him.

Confession

2005-04-15T17:47:00.000-07:00

Confession

And I watched him lie there,
In my bed.
While my soul was etched there,
In his head.
Written in a passion,
A love with no rhyme,
No reason needed,
Nor in time.

Head in the pillow
From the empty bottle
From the hard
The Passion
Heat
Sweat
The Love.

Its Love to be lying in my bed,
Heart etching on my head,
Thinking of those things he'd said,
And of my soul that bled.

Pray that the light does not take
This paralell of love when
The dull dawns.
And I will forget this moment,
A time of no hope.
Too tired to sleep
And too sad to weep.

Three in the morning.
Why bother.
A boy in my bed,
Because of the life I've led.
And the smoke that rises,
Falls and too soon
Disapears.

Flies with the breeze,
That sweeps through the dark,
Through the memories of those,
Who had this bed.
Ruffles the embers,
Of the night thats dead.
And twists the sheets,
Waking the boy in my bed.

"I love you" he said.
Smiling at the mouth,
Which he loves to kiss,
To touch and caress.
Trembling fingers that touch this mouth.
Beauty that brings me to the edge.

And as he touches my mouth,
With those fingers that tremble,
And I see his beauty which brings me to the edge.
But my eyes cant see, his lovley face.
My soul bursts with too many of this.
Too many boys in my bed,
There faces lost in a mind,
Which etches evey detail,
Every time and place.

That at three in the morning,
Ive got up and stared,
All the way to space.
Too many times I find myslef here.
Searching for Love, I find its a chase.
Till the dawn washes the memories away,
I'll stand here, having lost my Grace.

A hand on my back.
The hand of the boy in the bed.
No longer just a boy he said.
A man standing by you,
With his hand round your waist,
Begging you to come back to our bed.
Because I love you, so he said.

I turn and see his face,
Clear as the day thats a long way away.

And He leads his love back to our bed,
As on his chest I rest my head,
"I Love you to" I said,
And the bleeding stopped dead.

Post-drunk syndrome

2005-04-13T06:26:00.000-07:00

Im in a post-drunk syndrome

. Myself and Ally met Lala and Claire down at the beanscene last night. And claire had brought all her neo-christian friends down, including arch-christian Andrew A's ex gf, who he dumped because she wasnt 'pure', if you know what I mean, on the advice of the Head of the Inquisition in our school, Carron, whom is going out with Andrew now, surprise?

So anyway, I hadnt seen Claire in ages, and she told us what she did to her Naveed. Naveed (real name David, but if youve ever seen Still Game, you'll understand) is Claires longtime shag. Hes a totaly player, police cadet, shags anything that moves, got a car, plus will tell a girl he loves her, but says he doesnt want a gf. Wanker. So anyways, Claire was giving him a blowjob in his car (no euphamisms for me!) and he had all his clothes off, for some reason. And when he came, claire says she got a fright, and pushed him right out of the car, in the buff, and locked the door, while dangling the keys in front of him. So Naveed was standing outside, in the cold and dark, whith not a sausage on. And thats oor Claire for ya.

So meyslef, Ally and Lala bought some munchies, and went down to my uncles flat (im getting mine tomorrow I HOPE!) and we proceeded to drink 6 pints of Newcastle Brown Ale, and a large bottle of Martini, along with lots of crisps, cream cheese and roll-ups. Later on we walked all the way down to the trais station to get Allys 'friend' Claire M and Anna, sinfully the most boring people on the planet, who went into a huff because I wouldnt go inot the garage to buy some booze for them because the police were there. The three of us were already pissed, you could tell becuase when we walked along Titwood road, we traied to satnd on each others shoulders to steal the sign, but couldnt, so i just nicked a Traffic Notice sign, GO ME! Cleptomania.

So those rude bastards left, and Ally went off into the bedroom to have fone sex with matty. While me and Lala got more drunk and talked shite, it was great! Talked about Scotland and Camilla and Charles and everything. We also did something really, really vile. I had two condoms in the flat, left over from when i shagged Gordon (the one with the cleft face), so we blew them up, and stuck beer in one and tied it in a knot, then chucked it out the window, how vile!

Went to sleep at about 3, so roughly 12 hours ago. Me and Lala had the 'fouton style bed' - actually designed by a masochist, and ally got the couch, basically because her bodily fluids were all over it from when matty was up. eeew.

So came home a few hours ago, and feeling totally meh. its post-drunk syndrome. ive only had one fag the day, so thats probably the problem. Wait, Ive just realised, its called a hangover. Here I am writing a hole fucking post on a syndrome i htought was all new, and it was a fucking hangover the whole time.

Bloody Christians.

Judge not lest ye be judged

2005-04-12T07:50:00.000-07:00

Good Christ! Christians are everywhere, and in everything these days! No matter where you look, where you turn, you'll find someone with a crucifix, someone spreading the word, or someone being totally vulgar and offensive by not having sex. Its disgusting.

I recebtly heard that some american pharmaceutical companies, and some chemists, are beong allowed by law to refuse to sell the morning after pill, or even forms of contraception, to women. I found this disgusting. Medicine is about helping everyone, or allowing EVERYONE access to what they need or deserve. I mean, these christians go on and on about too many abortions, and i agree that it would be best if there were no abortions, and by giving women the morning after pill is a way to reduce that. I find it totaly offensive that someone who is ment to be in a position of respect and of help as a chemist can refuse you the morning after pill. Ive got a female friend who is allergic to latex condoms, and the only none latex ones available are extra thin. But she new that if the worst came to the worst, she could always go along to the chemist and get the morning after pill, with no judgement and no questions asked. When I was with my ex-girlfriend, we had a situation one night when the condom split, but it wasnt THAT big a deal, cause we knew that she could get the morning after pill and it would be ok. So if Christians start taking away womens rights, which they are doing with this, no doubt, then it creates complications for these womens lifestyles.

This is minority control, or even worse, the majority telling the minority how they should live. Freedom and democracy is just as much about protecting the rights of the minority, as it is serving the intrests of the majority. I think, in many places in america, the idea of liberal, free democracy is disapearing. I think in many places, Theocracy would be a better word, In that the church, and other christians, can control the rest of the population. No sex education, no strip clubs, no morning after pills or abortions, no drinking no gambling! Christians are taking the fun out of life, and worse than that, people are not being aloowed to live their lives the way they want BECAUSE of these 'people'.

I heard today that the IRANIAN parliament approved a law, allowing abortions for badly handicapped children up to four months, a lot more liberal than some places in america, and this is Iran, a real Theocracy.

Now it is a fact that some Muslim and Christian 'doctors' are refusing treatement to people like gays, or refusing to treat people with STD's or carry out abortions; and some legislators are trying to make this a right! When doctors become doctors, they take the hippocratic oath, saying that they have a duty to care for everyone who is sick.

"I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures which are required"

And so a Christian doctor refusing to treat a patient because s/he considers that patients lifestyle morally wrong is appaling, and i think, therefore, means that s/he is neither a doctor, nor a christian.

Who are these people, to tell us that the way we live our lives are offensive, and 'wrong'? Who are they, who think theyre the dogs bollocks of morals, and are so god damn high and mighty, that they can sit on their mountain and say 'you're evil, you're going to hell'. Well I find it offensive when christians come up to me and let me know Im going to hell, but i can be saved by paying 5 pound and going along to a church youth cult on a friday night, so they can tell me how evil i am. to which i love to reply, sorry, on friday im going to get very drunk and have a lot of gay sex with whoever i can find, and maybe next morning down some morning after pills, and that provides enough spiritual solice for me, thanks alot. (although, after seeing Constantine last nite, me and ally, lovingly referred to as anti-christs, wanted to run into a church and pray, so we wouldnt go to a hell as portrayed in Constantine, the best film ive seen in a while, with the scariest hell scenes ever. So if christians want to convert more people, forget peace and love and the rest of that hypocritical bullshite, show them Constantine, and tell them thats where theyre going if they dont come to mass on a sunday morning.)

So the fact of the matter is, Christians are ruining our lives. There stopping normal people from choosing whatever path that makes them happy. Im perfectley happy to let them have their religious freedoms, and to go around praying there mumbojumbo or watever, but we have our freedoms too. No one has higher morals than the next person, as morality is all a question of perspective. So christians, stop being so anal, stop getting ure arses into politics, where it doesnt belong, stop judgeing others, because others judge you to. "Judge not lest ye be judged" as some old fart said.

So what State in Europe are you from?

2005-04-08T09:32:00.000-07:00

I like to think of myslef as Scottish first, then European. I know some people who only see themselves as Scottish, or others who see themselves as just British, or French, or where ever they happen to live. However, Americans see us all as Europeans. That our Continent, or our Continental orginization, the EU, is some altogether binding factor which unites each of the 25 EU states together in a singular body of Politics, Culture and Heritage, as the US is. That, my friends, is bollocks.

America is a vast and different nation from coast to coast, but it is, i believe, a very fluid society. American families uproot to new states all the time, or grow up in one state and move to another. So where the States have a lot of power to themselves, one can move from state to state.

The federal government being the top tier, passes legislation affecting every state of the Union, and the President being he singular head of the collection of states, and the face of America to outside worlds. So it is not difficult to imagine how the general swave of Americans, being generally not as well in tune with world affairs, could come to see Europe, or the EU, as a nation state itself; with half as many member states as America, and a Parliament and Constitution (i hope) of its own.

The general american will have, say 3 generations or something ago, ancestors that came to America from somewhere in Europe. It is estimated that 25 million Americans claim Scottish ancestry, which is duely celebrated in Tartan Day, which is, i believe, soon, or has been. But i think there has been a fudging of ancestors, wheras im sure the individual will know which is the 'old country' a fudging together of the 'old countries' in the general cultur and phsyche has laid the foundations for the idea that Europe is the same as America.

Another factor to this, is that i think the majority of Europeans enjoy relativley the same way of life. Go to Estonia, say the centre of Tallinn on a saturday afternoon, and i bet you will see people shopping along the high street, kids off school looking around the shops with friends, and amazing architecture on every building. the same in Glasgow or Lyon or Barcalona or Bratislava or anywhere in the EU.

I feel myslef gettin off the point a wee bit here. Im trying to say that Americans view Europe as a nation, rather than a Continent of very different nations, and that they shouldnt. The EU is a loose confederation of 25 Independant countries, and the small, very small bit of legislation that the European Parliament controls is only to standardise it across the EU. But each Country is still its own, very different in languiage, culture and history from each other. Even so, that is still being eroded, you can drive from Paris to Brussels to Amsterdam to Luxembourg City and then to Berlin and Rome without a Passport, something which i think should be incorporated into all 25 States. And the Euro, i think is fantastic, that you can go anywhere in Europe soon, and just use the Euro in your pocket, and i wish the UK would hurry up and join it.

Hmm, i started this post with feverent nationalism and regionalism in my mind, trying to blame the yanks for seeing us as just 'Yurp'. But i have ended with the feeling that incorporating the 25 members into a single body of government, along American lines, with a European President, a powerull all-Europe legislative body, while still having regional parliaments and assembleys, would not be a bad idea. It would have to be done with all the checks and balances in place though. the EU president being subject to scrutiny form an EU senate with say between 2-5 senators from each nation, based on population, or just the same as america, with 2 senators regardless. And over time, the Prime Ministers and Presidents becoming governors of the States of the European union. But even then, it would still be very different from America Culturaly. More liberal, more inclusive, less of a Theocracy, and basically a better way of life for all Europeans, standardized across the whole EU. God damn it, i feel like singing Ode to Joy now,(the EU anthem). And im thinking wether or not i should consider myself European then scottish.

Hmm. anyway. that was a really bad post. It started out a Yank basher and turned into a whole Vive l'Europe thing. Ill put this one down to having a severe nicotine deficency, and go and correct that immediatley with a lovley, smooth, american Marlboro.

Some Poems

2005-04-08T04:52:00.000-07:00

I was inspired to put some of my poems on my blog by Kate, http://amatterofmuse.blogspot.com/ who is a really great poet, and of course inspired to write them by the great D, Aileen Doogan.

Times

Everytime I looked, I saw your eyes
Everytime you turned away, it brought
me pain,
Forever, So close, I was there, in
Insane
Everytime your silence shouts, a part of me
dies.

All the times you were there, standing
there, so long
Allthetime I willed you there,
wishing you were mine.
Forever it would seem, but for
ever, no signs.
All the times I could have had you then,
but no, it was too wrong.

Time could see us growing, Time
could see us loving,
Time could see us fall apart,
and Time could see us dying.
For every time there is a shout,
Times there are screams
Only Time can show us if, we
make it through, to time, and
time again.

For every Time I looked and
saw you
For all the Times I've said I Loved
You
For the short short Time we have
together,
Forever, I hope your mine.

12/1/05 - for a guy who never cared

Paul II

How can your heart feel love,
when you can lie so well?
How can you be from above,
when its so obvious your
from hell?
What makes me want to
hurt you, when I can see
you do that too?
How does anyone trust you?
they dont, they're no fools.

A fool was all I was to you
A simple mind you played
so well.
Your jealous body and 'your
own' style,
An 'individual' just like all
them too.

Hate cannot describe, all these
wonderful feelings I have for you
Joy would not suffice, for an
injury sustained to you
The Devil could not inflict, all
the pain that is due to you
But at the moment I have
no time, to even bother
thinking of you.

12/1/05 to a boy who should be six feet under

The Joys

Oh the joys, the joys
The joys of life, there are too many.
Too many things that cause me pleasure,
But oh, oh too little time to do any.

How I want to increase my time
How I want to live that moment again
Life, it travels far too fast to hold on
But hold on, and your life, you could regain.

The joys, are are they things that make life worth living?
Or are they jsut the spaces between when your life ain't giving?
The glass half full, or half empty, do you think?
But all it says to me is:
"Waiter, where the hell is my next drink?"

2005, musing upon life

Il Papa

2005-04-08T04:13:00.000-07:00

I'm watching the most incredible sight. The funeral of a great man, the Pope, is having his funeral, and I, like a billion others around this planet, can watch it live, and see the million people that are standing there in the Eternal City, watching John Paul the Great be buried. I am not catholic, and i greatly dislike all forms of religion, but right now, there is a situation where we have an ancient institution, whoes head has great, great oppertunities for promoting peace, and understanding between all peoples.

I think that was reflected in the fact that there was Eastern Patriarchs singing their songs to his coffin, and almost every world leader under the sun was present at the Funeral. For all Bushes faults, i was pleased that he was the first president to attend the funeral of a Pope.

Pope John Paul the Great was the most influencial person in ridding the world of communism, and we saw the fruits of that with Poland, a nation in mourning for their father, who ridded them of Communism, and gave them freedom. along with Victor Yuschenko, Hamid Karzai, and im pretty sure i saw the Ayatollah.

It just shows us though, how great a man he was. Visiting every corner of this earth. My Dad, and his side of the family, who are Catholics, fondly reminice about the time he visited Bellohouston Park in Glasgow in 1982. And i was humbled greatly earlier on in the week, when His Holiness was lying gravley ill, That my Aunt Theresse, who lives in Italy, and is in a Catholic singing group that goes around the world. she has met the Pope on mnay occaisons, and often goes to Rome. And i was humbled when my dad told me that they had seen one of her songs, that she had written, being sung in Polish, to pray for the Pope, i was overwhelmed.

He really was the peoples Pope, a great man, who deserves the title of Great, as well as the Title of Saint, and i hope and wish those cardinals can find one in their number who is just as great, as His Late Holiness, Pope John Paul II, the Great

Quiz Night!

2005-03-31T17:55:00.000-08:00

So anyways, I will be leaving the downward spiraling world of International Blogotics and tell you all about my Quiz Night!

Yes it is tonight! the high point on the Eastwood High School social calendar (right underneath the Night Out's, the Gig's, and Mandatory Blood Test Day) so our once strong and versatile team that consisted of Mr D. (aka Aileen), Mr A. (aka Ally) Kim and Agie (aka Jill and Angela) and myself (aka THE POOF!) have now been reduced to just myself, Aileen and Jill, Ally if she can get her ass in gear, but she tends to be 'sick' whenever something remotley un-fun pops up. i.e., my ex-boyfriend Barry, (aka Bagina, coz he is) when his show came up (he calls himself an actor) myslef, claire and ally were all doled up to go, waiting to meet at the train station, when alison decides she is ill. But nevermind, after a frantic wild goose chase through Glasgow, we found the theatre, and Claire had a great time screaming abuse at the performers, audience, ushers, chairs, and anyone in the general vicinty.

So anyways, Quiz Night starts at 7.30, and should be a good laugh. Our team name be the actual best on ever to be heard. since our members all smoke, I came up with the name The Black Lung Brigade, good or what!? It put a smile on the face of Mr McCormick anywho, the organiser and possibly the greatest Biology teacher in the Northern Hemisphere?

So anyways, I belive the questions will be on entertainment, not politics or international issues, which is why the TV is tuned to Neighbours, and not the News.

So anyways... Ally is very excitebale at the moment. her boyfreind Matty will be coming up to Glasgow from Liverpool next week! its very exciting, i belive he is the only man in the Brittish Isles to be 6"4, and sport a Ginger Afro. Very amusing. he is such a really nice guy though. Ally spends hours on the phone to him, talking in a very sensual manner (dirty girl) and god knows what he does on webcam ( i have been informed, however, that he is hung like a tyrranosaurus) He was quite stoned the day when Myslef and Ally were texting him during History. I would much rather hear a stoned liverpudlian than have to hear one more time about how blooduy King Richard and Philip Augustus had it off with each other! But if Richard Lionheart did prefer men to women, as the books say, does that mean he was the first gay character ever to be portrayed in a Disney Movie? I am of course thinking of the sublime, yet subtle magic of Walt Disneys Robin Hood. After doing my History Extended Essay on King John though, I now wish, as Aileen suggested, that I state in my essay that "King John was a lion, who ruled England from 1199 to 1216. His chief minister was a rather scheming snake called Hiss, and his arch-nemesis was a crafty fox by the name of Robin Hood." However, as open to new ideas as the SQA are (laughs pompousley) i decided against it, and instead wrote 2,500 words on whats was meant to be a disection of the ideas od the Community of the Realm and Magna Carta, but failed miserabley on both counts.

So anyways, its 1hour, 15 minutes till my Quiz Night, so i best be off, and if i'm not still spiting out Trivia by the time i return, i may detail the events, till then, in the words of Mahatma Ghandi, "Have it up, Have it off, Have it often"

Terry Schiavo

2005-03-30T21:00:00.000-08:00

Everyone is talking about Terry Schiavo, the poor woman who is, and has been for fifteen years, a vegetable 'living' in Florida. I think its been her thirteenth day without food or water, and I just hope it is over soon. This woman cannot FEEL a thing. She is as good as brain dead. Christians and other nuts have been fannying around outside her hospital for days and days, some were talking about rushing in and actually reeinserting her tube themselves, cause yeah, thats what we want, people who take their cues from the BIBLE deciding who suffers and who doesnt. These are the people that cheer and rejoice at executions for people who, many times, do not get the chance for a fair trial. These are the people that were FOR the execution of minors that was thankfully, eventually outlawed by the supreme court.

Terry aint gonna get any better. the Christian nuts actually believe there will be a miracle to save this woman. To me, religion has NOTHING to do with medical science, and medical science is saying that she will not get better. I can sympathise with the family of Terry, they have lost their daughter. they have LOST their daughter. it must be hard seeing her in this state for so long, without any hope, and when people have no hope, they turn to these crazy ideas that the church pumps out. Grieving for a lost one is hard, but the way to grieve does not include shoving her tube back in and out of her every five minutes. Her husband is her next of kin, and fifteen years ago, when this chemical imbalance tragically caused her to become a vegetable, he should have told them, and made damn sure she was aloud to die in peace! It should not be the right of the courts, or the right of Jeb Bush to decide who lives and dies. I was really shocked, along with a few educated Republicans, that Congress and bush had decided to stick their already blood soaked fingers into this. I know Irony doesnt go down well in the US, but for cryin out loud! Republicans taking up this case in Congress? The hill is for national issues, federal concerns! and I hate to think of what any man who put his name to that Constitution would think about this, that the federal government had the right to intervene so specificaly, on the right to die in peace of this one woman. I would think that haveing your food and water removed and put back in at the whim if a politician would constitute cruel and unusual punnishment.

Christians and other so called 'right-to-live' people (there the ones who support the death penalty for adulterers) claim that liberal-minded people just jump up and shout about letting her die, that they actually want to kill her. They blame and piss on science or medicine at any available time, yet the only thing keeping this woman alive is medical science that can artificially prolong the life of someone who should be dead. Terry is already dead, in that she has no life. and Christians want to prolong this suffering of a woman who is dead. leave them to rest in peace. If this world is so bad and evil, why do they want to keep her alive. Leave Terry to die in dignity, and Christians, go back to shouting down Gays and Feminists, we are smart enough to know when you talk shite, but leave this poor woman and her husband alone, and let the, and all of us, get on with our lives.

Hello World!

2005-03-30T20:31:00.000-08:00

Hello World! This is my blog and ig you have come this far, you might aswell keep reading...(who writes this shite??) If you are easily offended by extreme nudity, violence or liberal ideas, then look away, NOW!

So hello there, my name, is not important, but you can call me Nick. I may mention a few peoples names here, so i ask for forgiveness. But the 3 people i will probably mention the most are D, C, and A. You may notice the name of this blog is Bushwhacker Liberal, and thats exactly what its about! So grab your bushes, whack them hard, and come on down to Uncle Nicks yard!!

What the UN needs

2005-03-30T12:14:00.000-08:00

The UN, the thing which is ment to keep us from descending into another World War, needs a right kick up the arse, and do you know why? NO! not because of some Oil for Food 'scandal', which i think has been totaly overblown by FOX news, but because the US will not commit itslef to peace. It doesnt care what the rest of the world thinks, which is damn obvious from the Bush nuts and FOX dumbasses. "Who needs the rest of the world? Were America" or words to such effec6t which I am postitve Bush says to Condi Rice. America didnt give a shit about the UN, mainting peace, or WMD's which we all know now. But i think we need a right overhaul of how the UN works, and how other democracys in the world relate to each other,

I think the UN should set up a new Institution, the United Nations Orginization for Democratic Advancement, UNODA, which comprises of all the proper Democracys in the world, i.e. not just free and fair elections, but treaty obligiations, human rights, and free press etc. So it would basically comprise of the US, Canada, the 25 members of the EU, Switzerland and Norway if they wanted, Iceland, South Africa, Japan, South Korea, Taiwan, Australia, New Zealand, Israel, Brazil and India maybe; but basically if you are considered a Democracy, then you should be in UNODA. Now the members of UNODA should have like special trading privelages between each other, exchange of technologies etc. And they should have complete arms embargoes on all countries not in UNODA, plus a varying degree or diplomatic and economic sanctions on non-members. Because I dont think there are any privelages, apart from being a functioning western democracy, and having freedom for your population, for these countries that want to be accepted in the World Community, but still want to keep their tyrannical way of life. Saudi Arabia, Im looking at you. And it would give a great enticement for more Rose, Orange and Tulip Revolutions in Georgia, Ukraine and Krygyzstan respectivley. It would be such a brillaint reward for these countries that overthrow their oppressors, and as soon as they hold new elections, which are free and fair, which Georgia did, the Ukraine did last November, and Krygyzstan will in June, they would be accpeted into UNODA, and immediatley have all these new trading rights and a voice in the world. For a country to be admited, the members would have to vote, but if they filled all the requirements, I dont see why they wouldnt be admitted.

Now how would this work for the UN, more specifically, the Security Council. Currently we have the Five permanent members, plus ten elected countries, but Kofi Annan has put that under review. Frankly I find it offensive that Bastards such as Mugabe and other facists in Saudi and North Korea etc, could get a say in huge world events that need to be discussed in the Security Council. They should no way be any way, say or how that they should get a seat at the World table when they treat their citizens like that. Fucking unbelievable! anyway, i think the Security Council should be comprised of 10 permanent members, adding Brazil, Germany, Japan, South Africa and India, but with no new vetoes, and another 15 members, elected on renewable four year terms by the General Assembly, but only countries that are members of UNODA should be
elegible for this election, dont you agree? then youve got a situation where countries activley wanting to become democracies and trying to become members of UNODA so they get could get a seat at the Security Council, as well as economic privelages and being able to purchase weapons and that.

And to give the council teeth, which it so sorley needs, i would say that any nation that uses millitary action, (America and Britain!!) or contravenes UNODA rules, such as dealing with the really awful countries or trading in arms to non UNODA members, without the express consent of the Securtiy Council, would be suspended from UNODA, and the Security Council.
Anything has gotta be better than what is here now. Darfur has been in crisis for years, millions are suffering and over 300,000 people have been butchered and the World, specifically the UN, as the US has already called it Genocide, and nothing has been done. the worlds biggest living shite Robert Mugabe is still ruining Zimbabwe, tomorrow they go for an 'election' whcih if they dont vote for ZANU PF they starve, he is still there! get the Security Council to issue and International arrest warrant for him!!! and lets start taking action!